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znauts drama

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Started by #136427 at 25,Oct,14 14:17
Im sure a couple of you have seen my posts as of late. But if not here is a quick recap. My life has gone from awesome to shit since august. The wife and i used to have a great relationship, but for some reason either my doing hers, or a combination of both it is no more. We no longer have sex, we fight over little things, everyday is a challenge to get through. I have posted before situations and back story so i will not add it here but to say this. I work alot, we live in a tiny apartment for which we have a lease. My wife takes an excersise class that is more important to her than life itself. I have asked for advice before and am doing it again because of a new development in the story. You all have advised counseling to which i have tried to get her to do but she will not. Maybe that is what we need, but not what se wants. Anyway the new development is this. Last night i got a message from one of her coworkers asking how i am doing. I replied fine why? To which this tale of bullshit was set before me. The wife has been talking shit about me to everyone at her work. Saying i am a cheap son of a bitch, a real asshole. I make her feel hollow inside. Im like what? Because at home she for the most part nice, if not distant. Then her coworker informs me that there is a rumor that she is cheating on me. With another coworker. My informant felt after what they saw going on at work this past week that i should know about the rumors. What i am asking is how should i proceed with this?



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Comments:
By #495558 at 11,Aug,15 04:18
I would also ask for tax and sound financial advice on here
By #485312 at 11,Aug,15 06:21
and lm sure there'll be someone to give it too, they know everything here !!! *lix*



By #485312 at 11,Aug,15 02:42
so did you divorce her???


By #136427 at 09,Nov,14 02:18
What is the best way to move on? Ive been with her for so long i dont know what is me and what is us anymore... i feel sick...
By #472683 at 09,Nov,14 05:35
I'm sorry to say it may be time to file divorce papers. I mean, if you're both unhappy, and she thinks a better idea would be for you to move out, it's time to cut the cord so you both may be happy again.

By #136427 at 10,Nov,14 19:11
The part that hurts the most, is up until all this I thought everything was great! I feel betrayed, like all i thought was real was a lie...
By #472683 at 10,Nov,14 22:34
Look back with a critical eye--were there signs all along, but it was just too painful to accept?
By #136427 at 10,Nov,14 23:25
I dont know. We had a few fights. Then i snooped her text messages. I wanted to see what was going on in her head, see what she was talking to Her friends about. She was saying im an asshole. Then i read one to her male coworker. He said she should come over to his house. Her response was... "Lol that would go over well! If he goes out of town I'm there we'll cook then drink, i get loud and crazy when im drunk." Is that inappropriate for a married woman to say to another man. A man whose wife just left him?






By #136427 at 25,Oct,14 23:53
I now this is going to sound stupid, but i am freaking g out inside. I tried to say something last night but i froze up. It is like im afraid to say something. But i should say something, right?
By #435701 at 09,Nov,14 05:37
This is the first set of responses I have read about your situation. And I know how you feel. At 63 I have experienced a lot. And I know that your state of mind is clouding your judgement right now. I have been there, too. Is it possible for you to take some time away from this situation? And I mean take a trip for a couple weeks and see new things. Get a new perspective and then decide what you should do. Right now you are just buried in BS and do not see clearly.
By #136427 at 10,Nov,14 19:09
Im afraid if i go away, she will be gone when i come back. I know that is a possibility everyday when i leave for work bit i dont want to give her the easy way out...




By #136427 at 06,Nov,14 12:54
I tried to talk to her about going to a counselor. She said she doesnt need someone to tell her rules to follow or what boundaries need to be set. She had a better idea. She suggested i should move out. I have eaten very little and had less than adequate **** since then. What do you do when you are told the last 18 years have been a joke. What do you do when you thought everything was great, and then learn it was all a lie? Im so hurt, i cant think. My life sucks. If i didnt have kids id do something stupid. Ive tried willing myself to die, yet i live. Im going to see the counselor on my own. Ive read the biggest part and hardest part is relizing you need help.


By #136427 at 29,Oct,14 03:05
There is some thing going on, but she is not taking me seriously...
--------------------------------------- added after 8 hours

I tried to bring it up and she laughed it off saying people at her work have no life or anything better to do. I replied by saying where that is true your coworkers are losers, they are getting this idea from somewhere. I said your actions at work are making then think that you are sleeping with someone else. I listed a few things i heard and she just laughed. We are just friends she said. The other day she left her purse home by accident. I went thru it and found 2 odd receipts. I asked if she needed to have anything deducted from the bank ledger because im do the banking. She said no. Then i went thru her tablet and saw a shit ton of emails to this guy. Nothing was incriminating, but still it was more conversation than we have had in a week. I feel horrible for snooping, but also like i had no choice. I alos found out she is planning a trip to vegas to go to a seminar for her class she takes, and that she is deliberately keeping it **** from me because it is going to cost almost 2 grand and she will be gone a week... i have suggested counseling but she laughed and said she didnt think it was necessary because we are fine.. im not so sure...


By #316255 at 25,Oct,14 19:00
Talk to your wife.
By #136427 at 27,Oct,14 11:42
Should i just right out say what i heard, because thats most likely what will end up happening. Just blurt it out






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