Recent Posts of member bigg

Topics:

Corona: filling time 20,Mar,20 18:28
Rutger Hauer RIP 26,Jul,19 14:18

Posts:

By bigg at 18,May,20 13:07
No, the witch turned me into a newt.

I got better...….



By bigg at 17,May,20 18:32
A duck floats

Because itīs made of wood



By bigg at 10,May,20 16:23
Itīs Dennis from Jurassic Park! And he came (no pun intended) to a sticky end......



By bigg at 04,May,20 14:34
Looking at the original reference to underpants: would this be like the Garden of Vesse? to fertilise those vegetables? Funniest thread ever....



By bigg at 04,May,20 13:41
YES Yes yes yes.....yes...……...blub



By bigg at 02,May,20 17:00
perhaps itīs a result of an echo



By bigg at 28,Apr,20 16:01
I bought new underpants online from C&A. No choice since the shop is closed. No, I wonīt continue to buy underpants online when restrictions are lifted. It somehow doesnīt meet the excitement of going out to shop (not only for underpants), talk with nice checkout people and maybe buy an ice cream. Buying underpants online is boring.



By bigg at 28,Apr,20 15:54
Right, since no-one will be able to approach within 20 ft of you without a force 10 atomic gas mask



By bigg at 21,Apr,20 13:19
Depends. Would she be pretty?



By bigg at 21,Apr,20 13:13
For example only registered users can see external links
Focus on Covid 19 is all about the developed first world. Ventilators, hospital beds, social distancing todayīs death rates, daily statement from the government when will the shops open again etc etc. Much of the world doesnīt have this position and isnīt up there with the statistics but will likely suffer much more since the resources to protect arenīt the same



By bigg at 16,Apr,20 17:14
Hard to say anything if your mouth is full of dick. It might sound like mmmf mmm ggllghgh mmm



By bigg at 12,Apr,20 18:02
The Goodies...…Goody Good Yum Yum. Grew up on the Goodies



By bigg at 11,Apr,20 16:48
Nudists in Czechoslovakia now have to wear face masks



By bigg at 07,Apr,20 12:27
Iīve figured out how to make your own Social Distancing Aid.

You will need:

12.5 metres or about 14 yards of flexible curtain rail

Gaffer tape

About 20 ft of string

Brightly coloured paint.

Paint curtain rail with your selected, preferably hi-vis colour

Take the curtain rail, bend it in a circle and secure with tape.

Tie the string to opposite points on your circle.

Put middle of string on head, preferably leading left to right so as not to oppose vision. Hoop will dangle down through evenly distributed gravity and clearly indicate your 2 metre or 6 ft safety zone at all times.

Note: it may be difficult to go through a door or drive a motor vehicle with this safety aid



By bigg at 07,Apr,20 06:37
Good question, EU members are all taxed the same here as long as they are resident. Other nationalities: taxes are the same but health insurance, contributions to pensions etc may be different, donīt know.

Church tax is optional, anyone can opt out with a sworn affidavit. But donīt celebrate being rich: church tax is deducted from your income before tax assessment, so if you leave the church your contribution counts as extra taxable income for the state

I left the church, so canīt be buried in a church graveyard or married in a church service, not that I want either But I am a priest in the Church of Dudeism, no kidding only registered users can see external links



By bigg at 07,Apr,20 06:25
Faster access to treatment, better accommodation in a hospital stay, higher subventions from your insurance for rehab, dentistry etc.



By bigg at 07,Apr,20 06:22
Thatīs about right. Tax law here is complex, but (positively) health insurance, pension contributions etc are deducted before tax assessment of the rest, at about 30%. Commutes to work (I wish....) age, number of kids etc all play a part depending on Hans`plans



By bigg at 04,Apr,20 16:27
yep, itīs a little complicated but thatīs how its assessed. Theyīve got all it takes, to take all youīve got



By bigg at 03,Apr,20 17:52
Health insurance in Germany costs a little over 13% deduction per month from income before tax, itīs not free. Additional private insurance for the rich means better care, but the "basic" is quite good. Believe me, I've lived in several countries....Thereīs a nominal charge for prescription medications, and als0 a nominal charge (I think itīs about 10 euros per day) for a hospital stay, health insurance covers the rest.



By bigg at 01,Apr,20 17:16
Advice from Limerick on social distancing. Warning: need sense of humour only registered users can see external links



By bigg at 22,Mar,20 17:48
Dame Vera Lynn. Happy Birthday!

There'll be bluebirds over
The white cliffs of Dover
Tomorrow
Just you wait and see
There'll be love and laughter
And peace ever after
Tomorrow
When the world is free



By bigg at 22,Mar,20 17:40
yep, great movie. We bad, thatīs right WE bad. And donīt forget the fly scene



By bigg at 20,Mar,20 19:51
Yep, my pet. Sheīs a Texas Tan or in officialese Aphonopelma Chalcodes. Guess weīre going to spend more meaningful time together



By bigg at 17,Mar,20 14:25
Green Island Christy Moore

The island lies like a leaf upon the sea.
Green island like a leaf new-fallen from the tree.
Green turns to gold,
as morning breeze gently shakes the barley,
bending the yellow corn.
Green turns to gold,
there’s purple shadows on the distant mountains.
Sun in the yellow corn.

They came in their long ships from lands across the sea.
They came in their long ships – they saw the land was green.
Wind in the barley,
trout and salmon leaping in the rivers.
Sun in the yellow corn.
Leaping ashore
they slaughtered those laboured in the barley,
scything them down like corn.

The long ships sailed away and new invaders came.
With long bow and lance bringing death in England’s name.
With sword and with mace,
they went reaping though the fields of barley,
They plundered the yellow corn.
Crop followed crop,
they prospered in their killing fields of barley,
The harvest of new young corn.

Marching down the years the men of war they came,
with bombs, assassins, bullets, CS gas and guns.
Ghosts from the past
are chasing shadows through the fields of barley
hiding in the new young corn.
Nine hundred years
they tried to trap the wind that shakes the barley.
Sun in the yellow corn.

The island lies like a leaf upon the sea.
Green island like a leaf new-fallen from the tree.
Green turns to gold,
as morning breeze gently shakes the barley,
bending the yellow corn.
No force on Earth
can ever trap the wind that shakes the barley.
Sun in the yellow corn.



By bigg at 16,Mar,20 16:15
My bunghole it goes rakakaka rakakatokotoko uuaaa!!! And then sometimes my bunghole goes raawakakakabuaa bhhhuuuaua



By bigg at 12,Mar,20 17:31
Clearly an outbreak of Cornholio-itis. The great Cornholio needs TP for his bung-hole. Will there be TP in the lobby?



By bigg at 06,Mar,20 16:53
Same here in Germany, went to the local supermarket last Saturday and saw shopping carts stacked up with bog-roll. Shelves empty. Well, when the Corona hits, it must be reassuring to know that people can wipe their bum



By bigg at 02,Mar,20 17:33
Mae West



By bigg at 13,Feb,20 14:42
haha, I have the same toolbox no kidding. But I do different things with it



By bigg at 12,Feb,20 14:57
Iīll return when I come back! (Charlie Chaplin)



By bigg at 12,Feb,20 14:54
Tommy Cooper, the Master of Comedy Fred comes back from sea...



By bigg at 12,Feb,20 14:52
thought this was Duke Nukem..



By bigg at 20,Jan,20 17:05
perhaps scrambled eggs are being referred to here?



By bigg at 17,Jan,20 13:53
Vamoose, skedaddle, leave Texas, depart the scene in a rapid manner. It seems that the poster itself has already scrammed



By bigg at 19,Nov,19 16:10
now that IS funny



By bigg at 18,Nov,19 15:56
Yep, me too
--------------------------------------- added after 69 hours

yippee, works again



By bigg at 12,Nov,19 12:42
Traffic warning: a large hole has opened up in the middle of the road.

Experts are looking into it



By bigg at 30,Oct,19 17:48
What goes up

Must come down



By bigg at 28,Sep,19 16:49
There are two pots of gold at the ends of the rainbows, you need to catch the leprechaun though



By bigg at 25,Sep,19 13:59
Not on your Nelly

Any guesses?



By bigg at 22,Sep,19 17:16
Iīm not so sure. I liked to hold a crunchy dog biscuit under my dogīs nose when he was asleep and watch him going from "snore" mode to "nose twitch twitch sniff sniff mm yummy" mode and then wake up and munch.



By bigg at 11,Sep,19 15:13
At this moment I sit. IN front of my PC. Other times I stand.



By bigg at 02,Sep,19 16:54
doesnīt matter, but my last dog (donīt Keep Dogs anymore since iīm never at home) was a Dobermann boy named Max :-) Having said that, my Tarantula (easy pet to Keep) is a Girl called Fluffy



By bigg at 30,Aug,19 15:11
What does Marcellus Wallace look like?



By bigg at 30,Aug,19 15:01
Would they be, like, Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz?



By bigg at 29,Aug,19 16:53
No, remember Lucky Bags though (2p at the time, all of my pocket money), with luck a small toy inside. Late 60īs....them were the days....



By bigg at 29,Aug,19 16:47
because heīs bald?



By bigg at 21,Aug,19 16:21
wow yep, had forgotten this! Bazooka was 1p, whereas Blackjacks (licquorice) were two for a Haīpenny



By bigg at 19,Jun,19 13:43
Iīve heard the saying, "Iīll eat my hat" but Smoking it is something new. How would a hat fit in a pipe?



By bigg at 30,May,19 18:07
Jazz Version by the amazing Gudrun Carling only registered users can see external links
--------------------------------------- added after 89 seconds

duh, canīt put up a link. Look up in Youtube Carling, Mac the Knife.