Recent Posts of member Alan81

Posts:

By Alan81 at 13,Feb,24 12:51
Alanis 😜 She was a friends fav 26 years ago! It took this long for her to grow on me lol. Shout out to Kasey Chambers if you know her the song “The Captain” was written about and for the same said friend.



By Alan81 at 01,Feb,24 13:22
🐰No 🚫🥕carrots for you tonight then 🍽️ 🤣



By Alan81 at 30,Jan,24 06:18
Well the Carrot 🥕 is the most obvious vegetable choice for the young and curious of both sex’s especially when you have outgrown using your own fingers. You can also have fun shopping for it in public while looking for provocative shapes lol. I choose something with the same length and girth as my own erection (Tip: add +2 inches, as you need something to hold onto ) l was being curious to see if I would really enjoy anal, before giving it a go for real
If you’re a lass trying this vaginally I’d highly recommend a condom. For all other circumstances a good scrub with anti bacterial soap be the go. Warm water adds more flex to your carrot (You don’t want it to snap!) you also don’t want it hard and freezing cold straight out the fridge either. Lube? Well if you’re using a carrot instead of an approved dildo you’re probably a beginner at this so won’t have Xglide or the like handy unless it’s in your mums nightstand? 😏 So try a decent dessert spoon of coconut 🌴 butter or margarine. Be alone, put a towel down, being “empty” is obvious, favourite anal porn on the big screen. Go really slow but once your all there try matching the actor thrust for thrust if you enjoy it and can handle it, I guess it’s now pretty clear you can add this to the bedroom with your next partner, No not the carrot 🥕 lol. Anal I mean have fun and don’t forget to peal and thank that carrot properly 🍽️ ✌️ out.



By Alan81 at 13,Dec,23 08:52
An incredibly honest reply 👍 the real answer should be it depends how worked up and turned on I am by her. To all the guys taking about more than 20min of piv are you seriously enjoying yourselves, or are you really not interested or turned on enough? When you’re forced to do mental arithmetic in your head to last longer wheres the fun in that? it just becomes one long PT session, are you an accountant or her lover?



By Alan81 at 13,Dec,23 08:24
That’s an interesting observation as it’s never a shot porn uses? So for the #bi (curious) among us, Q: what’s more appealing to you as a giver, the head straight on (hehe) or the sight of spreed pussy waiting to be licked? YES the answers should be both but if both are ready and waiting what’s your… POV?



By Alan81 at 13,Dec,23 08:04
Well dirty roulette is free and ok if your already well worked up 😂 you will hardly find any women or couples in free mode, and even rarer if you can get them to not pass on you, only tip I have is go text only mode and build a convo before asking to get your bits out. Actually just inviting someone friendly on here to chat and asking if they are interested in joining your whereby room has worked for me a few times but I’m mostly chasing female voyeurs for my cam2cam partners and it’s not easily done, for me anyway. Enjoy the new phone 📱 hope you can txt one handed 😏 👋



By Alan81 at 20,Nov,22 05:13
Well Aborigines or Native Australians take offence to the term ABO so she needs to retract her comment and apologise for her ignorance about that term, or unfortunately she will be viewed as a racist IMO



By Alan81 at 14,Oct,22 23:56
BONER = Bronzed Onahole No Education Required

MOIST =



By Alan81 at 14,Oct,22 03:52
CLIT = Callgirls Literacy Initiative Trust

TWINK =



By Alan81 at 13,Oct,22 05:50
SMUT = Sexy Mums Underrated Tits

GSPOT =



By Alan81 at 18,Sep,22 14:00
It’s hardly worth replying to a narc but as your not the only reader of this I will humour your mud slinging schoolboy antics.

You say reach out for insight? You actually mean to say “look” this is how I bully people on here go see someone called CAT if you don’t believe that I’m top dog (asshole) around these parts, you don’t have to be so obtuse. Your pissing up a virtual lamp post and telling me watch out this site is my territory.

And if I had not “blacklisted” you? I’m sure you would have showered me with more of your filth in the form of gifts? What else can head bully boy do… I can feel your frustration, I’m just eating you up inside so badly right now especially since I’ve pegged your NPD spot on.

My analysis was based solely on your actions and responses, to go deeper would take time and one on one sessions, needless to say the cause lays somewhere in your childhood and for men it is often rooted in the lack of love from their mothers, I’m sorry you got screwed up, but I have no sympathy for a grown man taking out his anger on those who can’t fight back.

As to your insults, judging but the constant use of one word anti women slurs, (mother issues) and lack of imagination I guess you didn’t complete high school or maybe not even school C?

But I guess that fact uniquely qualifies you to pretend like your king dick around here.

👋



By Alan81 at 18,Sep,22 02:22
Sir-Cunt-Skittles

Spamming a new members account without so much as a world to me, is the very definition of cowardice, like a cheap sucker punch from behind.

On here you think your something special? And for that reason I already know in real life your not. Its very sad when a person such as yourself needs to inflate his wilting ego by belittling others.

I don’t pretend to know Alisha, but she/he had done nothing to deserve your bulling behaviour and juvenile antics, nor have I.

We won’t pretend you give a shit about your actions, because you don’t at face value anyway, deeper down in your psyche who knows what shame and failings your grandiose behaviour is covering up for?

I’m pretty sure you will never seek treatment, narcissists never do because they can never take the first step and admit they are in the wrong.

Skitzs for that reason you will forever remain a shallow little man and first class asshole



By Alan81 at 17,Sep,22 06:06
“ Too many lipsipsuckits can turn the non seasoned drinker into an ass” 🍻 your totally pissed out ya fn tree if that were the case 🍺😵‍💫



By Alan81 at 17,Sep,22 05:55
Well Dev your own welcome was about as warm and appreciated as finding a red back 🕷 in your crotch. Do you get Skitz to do all your dirty work for you?



By Alan81 at 17,Sep,22 05:44
Well it wouldn’t take a great mind to come to that obvious conclusion, but it would take an exceptionally stupid one (yours) to find connections where none exist. I suggest starting with the game connect four it’s ideal for Aussie’s and children under five alike



By Alan81 at 17,Sep,22 04:54
Wow genius you figured that one out all by yourself 👏 😂



By Alan81 at 17,Sep,22 04:50
Bella dear you yourself left a welcome note for me on my profile, which I appreciated, I am just an ordinary new member here, plain and simple I have no “vested interest” in Alisha69 besides having talked with her in the chat rooms, she appeared to have been harassed by the name and shame self appointed bigots this site attracts, (we know who you are) I haven’t yet figured out if they are just petty minded little men or jealous homophobes? I unfortunately have two “blacklists” one being Sir-Cunt-Skittles for cowardly spamming negative gifts to my page, without having the balls to so much as say a single word to me first… and the other is for a persistent wanker who constantly wanted to video chat with me so he could get off looking at my dick, funny but in the end annoying… and there you have it, all there is to know about me. Not very exciting now was it ?



By Alan81 at 12,Sep,22 02:43
DICE = Dicks Inside Cute Eunuch

CARDS =



By Alan81 at 12,Sep,22 02:40
TAPE = Tasty Arse Precum Ejaculate

CROWN =



By Alan81 at 11,Sep,22 23:32
PRINCE = Please Rinse Inside No Cunnilingus Expected

EARL =



By Alan81 at 11,Sep,22 23:19
You touched a valid point here, not that women do it as much as men (I don’t thing they do? IMO) but the reasons for doing it are often very different in both sex’s. Men masturbate as an alternative to sex (you’d chose to have sex instead right?) and to drive off the constant urges that trigger your sex drive every day, you’d need your eyes glued shut not to see something that makes the male brain think of sex at least once a day… (you don’t see women scurry off to a bathroom every time they see a Phallus shaped object or “hot guy” at a coffee and shop to seek relief 😮‍💨 ) now your point about her masturbation as a solo massage to relive stress is I think spot on, and is more atypical of women, it can become habitual and hardly connected to reliving sexual desire at all, but done just to relive stress… ( I don’t know about you guys but I visualise sexual acts with women when I masturbate ) whereas women concentrate more on the physical feeling of masturbating to bring about relaxation… see this is why women often say men are not needed in their lives unlike me who can’t live without them or at least the thought of them… and yes BELLA the answer to the OP question is NO… you happy? But by all means if I’m wrong girls feel free to uses my pics to relax 😂



By Alan81 at 11,Sep,22 22:04
PUKE = Playing Ukulele Kills Everything

DONG =



By Alan81 at 11,Sep,22 22:01
IRMA = Lesbian Ravishes Male Alpha

QUEEN =



By Alan81 at 11,Sep,22 21:58
QUIFF = Queens Undercarriage Insensitively Forcfully Fucked

ROYAL =