OLD TRADITIONS

By leopoldij at 26,Jul,22 17:55 other posts of leopoldij

1) A man and/or woman should act respectfully towards all women!!!

Yes. But I'd add: towards all human beings and animals.

2) Opening a door for a woman you are involved with (or not), or saying "ladies first" when you are kewing to enter something should still be common practice.

Yes, ladies always go first. In reality,
they do anyway, so why not acknowledge it?

3) Buying a drink for a woman at a bar/pub/club can be charming, if it is only one drink - the next drink shout should be her's if you are to be sure she is genuinely interested.

No. If I like her I'd buy her as many drinks as she likes.

4) A man should (still) have a firm handshake (i do realise that in some cultures the "common-place" on this differs) - there is no need to crush another man's hand and roll his knuckles if his is weak; but if he shakes your hand again he should realise that you respect a man with a non "dead-fish handshake".

Yes. Wimpy handshakes, from men or women, are creepy.

5) The arms locked between man and woman walk is still very cool!

Yes. I practice it.

6) No straight person should show any sort of discrimination towards a bisexual or gay person - the sex of person you are attracted to plays no part in characterising you as a person. That is "your character's" job, not your "sexual-affiliation's"!

I'm not sure I understand this convoluted statement. Briefly, however, nobody should discriminate towards anybody. Respect is fundamental. With one exception: I discriminate against stupid people, religious fundamentalists, and those who hold politicians in high esteem.

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:23

We all have our own ideas on what is proper behaviour and what is not. The one thing that i have heard in the replies to this thread that i'm not 100% on is "swearing/cussing/whatever you choose to call it" - by being so offended about it, you are kind of giving it more power than it may have been intended to have by the user...of course, don't swear at **** / the elderly / disabled people / the work place; but as far as general "swearing" goes, i don't even hear it unless it's one of the most offensive words or phrases. To me, "swearing" sometimes just acts as an exclamation mark and not the literal meaning behind it.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion on this matter though

By bella! at 16,Nov,18 09:48 other posts of bella!

I'm sorry, I don't agree with your point of view on "swearing/cussing/whatever you choose to call it" and being offended by it. If giving "it" (the choice of words) more power than it may have been intended to have by the user, the user should be mindful of the choice of words as to not be unclear or offensive. To say don't swear at c*hildren/the elderly/disabled people/the work place is a statement acknowledging that YOU RECOGNIZE that your choice of words is not appropriate. Why would anyone need a different vocabulary in order to converse with c*hildren/elderly/disabled/or the workplace? So you think it is inappropriate to call your c*hildren or c*hildren in general "little fuckers"? Why? Or to refer to my mom and pops or granny and gramps as "my mutha fucking parents" or grandparents. Gosh, I should be able to sashay into the bank and tell those cunts I'm there for a loan. Gee, must be their problem if they decided to think that my use of cunt was not meant in a friendly way by giving that word more power than how I delivered it.

There shouldn't be differences in vocabulary for c*hildren/elderly/disabled/workplace AND YOU KNOW IT! And that's the difference betweeen my generation and yours and/or possibly your geographic location. I kept reminding my nephews as they were growing up that it was better to develop good habits now then to break bad habits later. I still believe that to be a true statement.

By #675701 at 26,Jul,22 03:09

Does Bella work for the Administration?

By #275407 at 26,Jul,22 05:12

Bella owns this site, so watch it fella

By CAT-2 at 26,Jul,22 09:27 other posts of CAT-2

And she's very strict. She won't allow nude pics to be posted.

By t-rex at 14,Nov,18 14:42 other posts of t-rex

Very good traditions, I think maybe upbringing has a lot to do with these things also 👍

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:13

Yeah, of course...most things that we pick up are "environmentally-rooted"

By #542930 at 16,Nov,18 05:20

Ye it is what you are brought up to do that dictates your attitude to others be they men, women gay or straight

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:26

I believe intelligent people can break the molds of their upbringing; but yes, most people are ingrained with certain attitudes

By t-rex at 16,Nov,18 05:29 other posts of t-rex

I agree, although sometimes all the persuading, and good upbringing and it takes a few years to sink in, a lot of good parents have tried instilling their beliefs in their ****, yet some kids just take a few years for it to sink in

By Louis at 14,Nov,18 12:48 other posts of Louis

I agree with everything you said. I'm not sure though if it's a question of tradition or just plain good old fashioned minding one's manners. But either way it's not something you really see much of nowadays. Probably because it seems that to believe in traditions now, just about any tradition is not "politically correct", which I think is total bullshit.

By #569341 at 14,Nov,18 13:10

Hear, hear

By DeepThroatThis at 14,Nov,18 16:28 other posts of DeepThroatThis

Well said......add, respect is earned not given.

By *kmadeau* at 14,Nov,18 16:38 other posts of *kmadeau*

yeah, very correct

By JustWill at 14,Nov,18 17:33 other posts of JustWill

That depends on how you define "respect". Everyone deserves to be treated with common courtesy and regard. Being polite to others should always be a given.

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:09

One of the sayings that is closest to my ethos too, A1-E-M

By #542930 at 16,Nov,18 05:22

That is true but respect comes first from the man & then any others he interacts with from then on.

By #536316 at 14,Nov,18 15:41

all well stated and great

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:11

Cheers, champion (:

By mr_blue at 14,Nov,18 19:27 other posts of mr_blue

If you sprinkle when you tinkle,
Please be neat and wipe the seat....

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:11

At home, yes. In public, nah (i ain't touching no public toilet)

By jahonzin at 15,Nov,18 07:06 other posts of jahonzin

I couldn't write it any better.

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:07

I'm sure you could've...but cheers, jahonzin

By #545362 at 14,Nov,18 21:03

Treat others as you would like to be treated. We each have our own "bubble" we live in and that bubble should never encroach on another's without their consent.

By #569341 at 16,Nov,18 05:06

A concise synopsis of a couple of my points - SC

. Good man

By #537202 at 15,Nov,18 09:05

Not a bad read...

only registered users can see external links

By bella! at 14,Nov,18 14:19 other posts of bella!

Manners, traditions, etc are learned and that means it starts with the family. Again, I was overwhelmed by the number of young people with their foul mouths. Young people, 12, 13, 14, 15 who drop the "f" bomb, wherever and whenever. Either I live in a redneck town or our young people are just a sampling of various places, everywhere. One day I'm in the local McDonald's and the young boys, I suspect under 16 years of age, were having a spirited discussion. It was "f" this and "f" that and I turned to shoot them a glare and I was appalled to see one boy's momma sitting with them. Look, I'm not saying that my language isn't colorful at times, but I don't talk like a drunken sailor to my parents, out of respect OR at work because it is expected that I will conduct myself in a professional manner.

By #460385 at 14,Nov,18 16:43

Well when the judges took our right to parent, this new generation of kids went to hell. When I was disrespectful as a k-id I got my ass beat. Now you can't do that, hell you can't tell your kids your gonna beat their ass, because the cops will be knocking on the door. If you can't discipline your kids how can you teach them manners. If you tell a 14 year old to do something and they don't want to do it. What are you supposed to do put him in timeout. Unfortunately, this is the result of the pussification of America. My oldest who is 25 now was probably around 7 years old at the time. I can't remember what he did but I was going to spank his ass to discipline him. At 7 years old he proceeded to tell me that if I spanked him his teacher told him he should call the police. To make a long story short, I told him to walk over to the phone and dial 911 and tell them whatever he wanted to. I then told him it would take them at least five minutes to get to the house and it would be the worst five minutes of his life. Needless to say nothing ever happened, I backed down and kind of just laughed. Now he is a police officer himself. I'm a firm believer if you allow parents to discipline their k-ids and I don't mean to beat them. Then the police, judges, and prison systems won't have to do it later on.

By JustWill at 14,Nov,18 17:13 other posts of JustWill

We are on the same page here, CC54. (Yes, I know that most folks around here view me as a "liberal", but I am actually a "grey area" kinda guy in reality.) Sometimes, a k1d needs a good swat on the ass to set them straight.

Parents who want to be their k1d's "friend" are assholes, and they aren't doing the brat any favors. A parent's job is to teach their ch1ld right from wrong and to prepare them for the harsh realities of life, not to be their buddy.

By bella! at 14,Nov,18 17:28 other posts of bella!

I don't know how to ask this properly, do you teach regular run of the mill students in a regular public school or are your students in accelerated studies in a school of choice? Do you find that the young people are rude, tough, sassy or isn't that something you see. I can remember an altercation taking place in a Detroit Public School last year. There were two male students that started brawling in the classroom. The teacher's panic button to alert school security was not operable so she jumped in with a broom to break it up and for her actions, she was disciplined. WTF!?

By JustWill at 14,Nov,18 21:03 other posts of JustWill

I teach at a regular public school in a suburban/rural area.
Most of my classes are regular English Lit, but I also teach two AP classes. (The AP classes require much more work on my part as far as curriculum goes, but I enjoy them more. Mostly because the students WANT to be there, are focused on academics (and a future in college), tend to be...brighter...and actually enjoy the work.)
I have a strict set of rules and expectations for classroom behavior and schoolwork, which I explain to each class on the first day of school. Their parents also get a copy, so that we are all on the same page.
Violations of the rules earn consequences (extra work, detention, a drop in letter grade, etc.). Break the rules, and you pay the price.
I like my students to enjoy their time in class, and I encourage them to express their opinions and ideas freely...provided that they do so respectfully and intelligently. However, I don't put up with any shit (from them or their parents).

By bella! at 14,Nov,18 22:13 other posts of bella!

Your last statement, good on YOU! Way too often, it is the parent that is the problem. Several months ago, I was at a nearby aquatic center when a busload of middle schoolers, somewhere in the age range of 12 to 13 years of age, came in with their Phys Ed instructor. The students were wound up but not overly wild. I took that opportunity to ask the instructor what a typical school day was like in 2018. He metioned that students vary, however, I do recall him saying that a number of the hiccups involve parents. Probably much like you, he provided his expectations of want he wanted from them in conduct as well as work. He said that often times, little Johnny's parents got into a spin when Johnny's homework conflicted with a family outing or vacation and they failed to acknowledge that Johnny knew about this assignment for several weeks. Parents would even take matters as far as the Superintendent. Seems like things are political and teacher's hands are tied so they must back down. It's a shame that parents make excuses for their darlings rather than knuckling down and making little Johnny be responsible.

I was the middle c*hild, I gave my parents a run for their money. I wasn't really what I would consider bad, but I was not an angel. I think if I would have been a parent, my foot would have been permanently inserted up my little darling's ass.

By veryshyguy at 15,Nov,18 00:02 other posts of veryshyguy

It is time for the parents to take back "parenting". I know how difficult that would be for many of them, but it is their responsibility.

Many of the k*ids feel they are entitled to do whatever they want, whenever they want and get whatever they want and not have to work for it.

It is sad, but I seem to feel a lot of young folks are losing their manners and respect. I see it all the time.

Responsibility falls on the parents to ensure their k*ids are disciplined and take responsibility for their actions.

I am glad I am getting too old to care anymore...

By bella! at 14,Nov,18 17:18 other posts of bella!

Some years back, I was staying with and supervising my nephews while their parents were out of town. I asked that the oldest do something and I got a lot of lip over my request, what's the younger one going to do, and so on. Bottom line, there was so much sass and dialogue over this request I made, I said that he would hot be able to participate in the plans he had for later AND he still had to do whatever I asked him to do. Lots more lip from him and to make matters worse, he balled up his fist like he was going to punch me out. To make a long story short, I told him to go ahead, take a swing at me and if he did, I was going to beat the shit out of him. He threatened to call the police and I told him to go ahead but to make sure he requested an EMS squad because he was going to need it after I tore into his ass.

I never had ch,ildren and I wonder how my parenting skills would have been. I have had conversations with my s,ister things the about what the "little darlings" were into and her parental choices. She usually would just get pissed with me but I was okay with that. I'm not into physical v,iolence and I know teenagers test the waters so I don't know what the true fix is.

By phart at 14,Nov,18 18:12 other posts of phart

Although alot of my whippings as a chi1d were taken to the extreme,as in horse whip,not belt,or paddle,I agree with the need for spankings.It was also no holds barred on where the whip landed.Which meant I went to school with marks accross my face,back and so on.BUT I have never been in jail,or stole a car or bashed a
mailbox or killed anyone. I was taught to behave and respect some things and sadly moreso to fear lawenforement than respect them. I have struggled to learn to respect ,not fear the lawenforcement.

By #460385 at 14,Nov,18 18:28

There is no fix bella. Unfortunately you have to let the little bastards do what they want because there's nothing we can do about it. I just had an altercation with my 18 year old son a few weeks back. He was running his mouth to his mother and I stepped in. I basically told him if he didn't like living here to pack your sh1t and get out. Then of course he started with I don't have to leave and you can't make me leave. So I calmly said yeah I guess you're right. And usually with him just give him a few hours to cool off and he's back to being normal again. And as badly as I wanted to knock his ass out and show him what a little boy he really is. I didn't because I know I'd go to jail. It's a catch-22 raising kids in this day and age. You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't. And if you spank them you're a criminal, or you got all of these shrinks and professionals telling you he'll grow up with mental illness and problems. See I believe that if you knock all that illness out of them when they're young, they'll grow up to be productive citizens. The reason they turn out messed up is because they never been disciplined. And they don't have any people skills because their best friend is a damn video game.

By #569242 at 14,Nov,18 20:07

Agree with you. I never heard or knew what the "F" word until I was about 16. Never used foul language around my kids, but my daughter heard almost everything from the neighbor boy who's parents shouldn't have been parents.

By JustWill at 14,Nov,18 17:23 other posts of JustWill

A slight adjustment to your first point:
People should act respectfully to ALL people.

Unfortunately, we are living in an age where common courtesy is nearly extinct.

By phart at 14,Nov,18 14:32 other posts of phart

It is just good manners and respect.
I can't understand why young people want to cuss so much in public around all other folks.Other younger k1ds don't need to hear the F bomb at 4 years old. And frankly alot of older folks,just don't want to hear it and shouldn't have to. Lack of parenting I guess.

OLD TRADITIONS

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